Friday, June 11, 2010

I miss my father

I'm in L.A., staying on the Westside, not 2-1/2 miles from the oceanfront apartment building in which I for the most part grew up (deliberate double entendre). I can't even tell if my little brother David had been born yet - I think not. I was two when he was born and I'm so little here.

My mother Helen is on the left and my father David is holding me, proud as proud can be. I was his first child, my mother's second. And yes, until I was 5 years old, I was blonde!

I drive these streets and cry. Not all the time. But I am struck grieving the loss of my father who died in 1988 after being shattered by a massive stroke in 1987. I was 3 months sober. He never spoke again after that. I never recorded his voice or begged him for stories of his childhood that he never offered. He lost his parents and siblings to a Nazi death camp in WWII, a handful of years after having come by himself to America to live with and work for an uncle in NYC. He never spoke of his family. Once I wrote down their names. That was all he would say.

I've cried even from the Central Coast, from the bliss joys of the oceanfront in Pismo Beach, missing my beloved father. Cherishing my father. Thanking God for the man who raised me as best he could and for whom I pray every night. Mom will be another blog entry; this one is for my Dad.

I'm seeing people I love, many of whom I haven't seen in yonks. I adore where I live now in northern Marin County - I love my Church community, my friends, the glories of nature. This - southern California - is where I grew up. There is a visceral tug that stuns me, from the Westside to the South Bay. I turn another corner and think of my father.

--->HERE<--- are PHOTOS of my Journey so far. Click and enjoy.


  1. Although I only knew your dad for a couple of years, he impressed me as a man who saw life in perspective. Having your family murdered will do that to you. Watching a precious son die as a child will do that to you.

    Some will react to emotional pain by shutting down feelings. Refusing to care. David Luboff was warm, open, friendly and kind. He cared about a great many people and things, most of all, you. He was always as proud of you as he was in that picture.

    His next greatest pride was his success. He had come to America with almost nothing, worked hard and done very well. I am honored to have known such a man. We shall not see his like again.

    Celebrate him!


  2. That is such a beautiful and heartfelt tribute. God bless you SO MUCH.